Chapter 40 – The Alpha’s Defiant Mate Novel

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Jay-la POV

He was back wearing jeans and a tee-shirt, ‘Kora, I left the door to the bathroom open, why don’t you go in and shift, I would like to see….my Mate.’ his voice soft and gentle, nothing in it that made Kora think she couldn’t trust him, she turned and headed off to do as he said.

She shifted the minute she was in the bathroom. Jay-la closed the door to keep him out. She was naked and needed a minute still. Things were not going as she thought they would.

There was a shirt in the room, it was his. He’d always been taller than her, a good foot taller. The shirt would cover her completely but she would still be naked under it. She pulled it on, there was nothing else, it smelled like him. She had once loved walking around in his room in his shirts. If he tried to forcibly mark and mate her, there wasn’t much to go through. And he would be much stronger physically. She bit her lip.

‘Stop that he is not going to, did Havoc?’ Kora sounded annoyed now.

‘No, but.’

‘No buts. I will make you go out there.’ Kora was warning her not to do anything to ruin her and Havoc’s bond.

Jay-la looked at her appearance in the mirror, washed her face, she was less than ready for this meeting, her hair she smoothed out as best she could, but really that was all she could do. At least it was warm in here. The entire pack house, as did the majority of homes, had heated flooring, to help with winter time.

She could feel Kora starting to get impatient, and sighed ‘I’m going already.’ she muttered to her wolf, then turned and stepped out of the bathroom to finally face him. Her heart was hammering in her chest, unfortunately not from pure excitement of the Mate Bond.

He was standing over by the couch, he had lit the fireplace. Had she been in the bathroom that long? Or was he just used to doing it, and could do it with ease. He was watching her every move, she noted he looked a bit on the tense side. Maybe he didn’t know what to expect either. She didn’t say anything, didn’t know what to say to be honest. Just kind of stood there and watched him wearily from near the door to his office.

“Come in,” he said, “please sit, we need to talk I believe.” he was gesturing to the couch by the fireplace.

She looked at the door and wondered if Jackson would still be standing on the other side of it. She heard him sigh heavily.

“Jay-la please, I know things aren’t great right now, but I know you don’t understand everything that’s going on either. Please sit…I am not going to touch you, will never hurt you. I assure you, you are safe in this room with me.”

Her eyes moved back to him, met his blue ones for maybe five seconds and fell away, she knew what he was to her right this minute, knew what he had been to her all those years ago, and how he’d felt about her the day he’d made her leave. But none of that actually comforted her right this minute. All she could think about was the last time she had been in this office, his anger towards her.

She caught movement in her peripheral vision and shot her eyes to him. He’d taken a step towards her, she backed up, a hand reaching for the door handle she knew was back there somewhere. Watched him stop moving and look at her hand, heard him swear softly.

“Please don’t run.” he sighed, “It hurts every time you run away from me.”

That’s rich, she thought, considering he was the one to tell her to leave and never come back, how could it hurt him? It certainly hadn’t the day he had ordered her to, it had only hurt her. She could feel tears brimming at the reminder of the pain she had felt that day.

“You don’t know what pain is.” she shot at him a little angry.

“Yes I do, Jay-la. Believe me…I do.”

“No you don’t. I lost everything that day. My family, my friends, my pack, the man…” she stopped speaking and shook her head “What did you loose that day? Nothing is what.”

“I lost one of my closest best friends that day, Jay-la. Because I acted on an impulse, without thinking is all. I am sorry for that, I really am.”

“There is only one reason you’re sorry, beg my pardon, three reasons you’re sorry.” the sarcasm came out of her with every word, he was only sorry because she had been pregnant. Because they now share pups.

“That is not true, I didn’t even know about them when I was trying to get you to come home.” he ran his hands through his hair and sighed, “I know this is all screwed up, but we can fix it.”

“We?” she raised an eyebrow at him. “ That implies”

He cut her off in a rush. “Don’t Jay-la,” he was shaking his head. “please don’t reject me.” his hands were out in front of him, “Just give me a chance to explain, I can explain. All of it, I promise.”

Jay-la stared at him, he actually looked like he was pleading with her. She stared at him for a long minute, “Did you order Abbey to hurt my mother?” changing topic was better than him trying to convince her to stay at this point. She needed time to think about everything.

“No, and she is going to be severely punished first thing this morning. I was extremely pissed off when I heard what she had done.”

“How can you let her just go about and hurt people in the pack, how is it she thinks its okay?” Jay-la asked.

“I had no knowledge of what had happened here. Actually it happened while I was unconscious due to wolfs-bane injected into me. The Alpha unit can attest to that. None of them had any knowledge of it. I assure you I would never allow that. What Abbey did, going to your parents and convincing them to allow her to attack your mother in a bid to get you to come here, was nothing I would ever approve of.”

“Wh…What?” Did she hear that right? Her mother and father allowed it. No, she must not have heard right “I don’t understand. Did you just say they did this to me? Made me feel like that.” she shook her head, no. No, they would never.

“Shit! I’m sorry I thought you knew you did attack Abbey. I just assumed you knew. Oh jay-la, I would never have told you like that, I’m so sorry.” he stepped towards her quickly.

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