Chapter 155 – Falling for the Alpha as a Surrogate Novel

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Ella

When I walk into breakfast the next morning, I have to try and hide my wince as I sit down. My bottom is sore and stings when it meets the chair, but the bite of pain also sends a pulse of heat through my body, calling up the memories of what came next.

I feel my mate’s eyes on me, and when I look up, Sinclair is watching me with a knowing smirk. He looks so wolfish in this moment that I find myself wondering how I ever thought he was anything but a ruthless predator. Is there a problem, trouble? He asks in my head.

I don’t know what you’re talking about. I sniff, turning my nose up at him.

This earns only a smug chuckle in reply, and I have to fight to hide my blush. “Well you two certainly found each other.” The king observes warmly. “You’d think there wasn’t anyone else in the room.”

Feeling a spark of inspiration, I jolt, “Oh, your majesty, when did you get here?” The entire table laughs, and Sinclair slides his hand onto my thigh, sending zings of pure affection through our bond.

“Please call me Gabriel, Ella. There are no formalities in my household.” The King replies, smiling widely. “How did you sleep last night?”

“Very well.” I answer happily, and the steady weight of Sinclair’s hand shifts as his fingers begin to trace circles on my inner thigh.

As we continue making small talk he slides his hands even higher, slipping right up my skirt between my legs. No one would ever know from looking at him that he’s doing anything under the table, but he can barely smother his hungry growl when he realizes I’m not wearing panties. Going commando, you bad girl?

I didn’t intend to, but when I tried putting on my panties the fabric just irritated my… skin. It’s a struggle even to get the words out. I can feel my skin heating with excitement and embarrassment, shocked by my own daring. I can’t believe he’s touching me this way with so many people around us, when we could be discovered at any moment.

Oh come on, Sinclair teases, circling my clit. You can do better than that.

My heart rate is increasing, and I’m sure the others can hear it, surely Sinclair isn’t going to actually continue this teasing. If it goes on much longer everyone will be able to smell my desire. Before I can think to reply, the King speaks again, pulling our attention away from one another. “I do hope you’ll join our tour of the city today, now that you’re off bed rest.”

“I can’t wait.” I answer honestly. I’d been jealous when he first offered to take our group around today and show us the capital, assuming that I wouldn’t be able to join. Now I can’t wait. After everything we’ve been through, we could use some normalcy – even if it’s only for a day.

“You’ll have to take notes of your favorite things so you can tell me all about them later.” He tells me, and I blink in surprise.

“You mean you aren’t coming?” I clarify, my wolf whining with unhappiness. He sends back a silent purr, and I lash out at the comforting sound.

“I wish I could, sweetheart.” Sinclair frowns. “But I have too much work to do. The news last night… things are even worse than I feared.”

“I know everything is terrible, Dominic. I was just excited to spend the day with you.” I reply, giving him my best puppy dog eyes. “When was the last time we got to be out together without the campaign looming over us, have we ever?”

Sinclair’s wolf groans in my head. “Don’t give me that look, baby. I can’t stand it.” His hand goes still, retreating from my intimate flesh to rest on my thigh. “Every minute counts here. Every second we waste is another moment the people in the united pack suffer. Mere minutes could be the difference between life and death for too many to count.”

“But you can’t help them if you burn out, Dominic.” I argue, recalling the wave of appreciation he’d sent to me last night just before we fell asleep. I’m fully embracing my duty to help my mate decompress and find small ways to feel in control amidst chaos.

‘Your mate is right, Dorn.” Gabriel echoes, “You all have been through far too much. You need to take a breather so that you can come back for your people stronger than ever.”

Sinclair looks as though he doesn’t like this idea one bit. His face closes off, and I can feel his stubborn wolf digging in his heels. “I appreciate what you’re both saying, and I can even acknowledge that there’s some truth in it. But being able to disconnect is a privilege the Moon Valley wolves simply don’t have right now, and I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if I did when they need me most.”

“Son, you should listen to your mate.” Henry sighs. “At the rate your going you’ll run yourself into the ground before the week is out.”

Sinclair only frowns deeper, and his hands close into fists. “I appreciate your concern but-”

“If you appreciate our concern then listen, Dorn.” Roger interjects.

I can feel his frustration rising, and the higher and higher it builds, the more uneasy I become. Sinclair abruptly slams one of his fists on the table before opening and closing his mouth. In the end he pushes away from the table and storms out without another word. I know he doesn’t have his wolf in control and he’s leaving to avoid lashing out, but I follow him anyway.

“Ella let him go,” Hugo advises, “He needs to work through this alone.”

I pause in the doorway, looking back at my father in law. “I have to.” I shrug, before stalking after my mate.

I find him in our suite, pacing back and forth, breath heaving. I suspect he wants to shift, he came up to our forest sanctuary to try and satisfy his inner animal, so that he wouldn’ be forced to take off on a time consuming run. He looks up when I enter, “You don’t want to be around me right now, little wolf.”

‘Yes I do.” I reply, swaying my hips as I glide forward. “I always want to be around you.”

‘This isn’t a game, Ella.” Sinclair growls. “I’m this close to losing it.” He shares, holding his finger and thumb an imperceptible distance from one another.

“So lose it.” I order. “How many times have I lost it around you?”

“That’s different.” My mate grumbles, “you losing it isn’t a threat to me.”

‘You won’t hurt me.” I say confidently, moving closer even as he scowls at me. “I can feel your love for me too strongly and I’m not made of glass.”

Sinclair huffs, “I know that, but-”

“Lose it.” I press, putting some force behind the words now. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”

I can see it the moment he snaps, the moment his resolve gives way. He snarls and glares at me as the words are wrenched from his lips. “I’m thinking that it’s easy for Gabriel and my father and brother to sit there and tell me what to do, when they’re not the ones who are responsible for a pack in crisis. I’m thinking that you shouldn’t be worrying about me and the fact that you are means I’m failing you! I hate that I can’t spend time with you when we’re so newly mated, that I’m missing out on seeing you create a miracle.” He continues, gesturing to my midsection.

Sinclair continues to vent, getting louder and louder with every word. “I hate everything that led us to this place. I hate having to sit by and do nothing, because war takes time. I’m thinking I should have stayed and fought, even if there was no chance of winning. I’m thinking I’m a traitor for abandoning my people.” He pauses, looking so feral I honestly feel a little afraid. “And I’m thinking that if Damon were in front of me now I would rip off his manhood, then rip off his fingers and toes one at a time. And I’d keep going that way until he was just a headless torso, but I’d keep him alive for as long as possible to maximize his suffering.”

He throws the last words out in a fit of rage, and after he just glowers at me, heaving in ragged breaths of air. Sinclair’s heartbeat is pounding and I can feel his wolf’s erratic energy, his worry about frightening me. At the same time, I can feel the tension draining out of him like a valve just opened and sucked out all the toxic energy from his veins. He’s watching me closely, waiting for a response, and I slowly approach him. “Feel better?” I ask, knowing very well how cathartic it can be to simply shout your grievances to the heavens, even if nothing comes of it.

Sinclair shakes his head and offers me an exasperated laugh. “Yes, you impossible thing,” He confesses, dragging one powerful hand through his hair. His entire mood transforms before my eyes, “I do, are you happy?”

“I’m happy if you’re happy.” I murmur, sliding closer and wrapping my arms around him, “You aren’t failing me. But if you don’t give yourself a break, then you’re going to end up failing the very people you’re fighting for.” I profess, and just in case, I add. “Besides, are you really going to let your breeding mate wander around a strange city without you? Who knows what terrible things might happen to me.”

Sinclair chuckles and claims my lips, “Alright trouble, you win – just this once.

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