Filed to story: Owned by the Alphas Novel
“She already turned on Silas; if you let her out of those cuffs, she’ll turn on us too.
Until she knows for sure you are going to honor your word, don’t let her out,”
Beenie warned, her eyes wild.
I checked her feelings with my shadows, grimacing when I felt her entire being warn me off doing it.
“This is why I stay away from the pack,” she muttered, then handed Enzi to Cain and stormed from the room.
“She’s…”
“Stressed. Leave it, Brax. You don’t know what she’s dealing with,” Cain shook his head. I knew better than to tread there since I had been like that before Kai and Derik had accepted me.
I had been so nervous about the pack finding out I couldn’t turn. When I had been forced into it, I had been nervous again for them to find out how I had been able to; I had shied away from any responsibilities.
I had let my parents run the pack for too long, then all for the merging of the packs so I could lean on my brothers. It was time that stopped. I had taken it from Derik while he fell apart, but I understood how hard it was even after one day.
I was so torn in every direction, in my head, my heart; it was chaotic. I had to keep an eye on every team, every wolf, checking their control, their emotions, and then to open that link was to feel more from Lorelai and Nikolai. Add to that my shadows, and I was a mess.
But I had to hide it, and I had never given Derik enough credit for how well he had always done that.
“I’m sorry, you know? For what happened back then. We didn’t mean to force that, and the witches were vague with what would happen.” Cain swallowed, and I turned away. I didn’t want to talk about that time in my life, especially not with him.
It had happened; I was a werewolf, I turned just like they wanted, and I stole a wolf that was never mine. But it was done, and it was my guilt to live with.
Cain followed though, putting Enzi in her bed and covering her with a blanket. I put Zale in with her, then wrapped their bassinet in my shadows and went back to the window, taking a look outside. The dark seemed darker somehow.
Cain sighed deeply and stood next to me before he spoke again.
“I’ll let you in on a secret, Brax. Mom had to do what she did. She tried to argue; she went to the witches to tell them of your parents’ request, and she said no. She tried to refuse,” Cain said, his voice raising, his anger touching me and my shadows.
I frowned at him, hating that his words were sinking in, that they were making me feel things I thought I had put away.
“She tried?”
“They showed her what would happen if she didn’t,” Cain shook his head. “You would have been killed. Every single wolf in the pack would have torn you to shreds. Your parents would have handed the pack over to the next lineage, and it would have been a completely different future. The joint pack would have broken apart, and Silas would have picked every single one of you off.”
“So you’re using the ‘it was for the greater good’ excuse?” I scoffed, hating that it was so clich?. Of course, it was; my parents had said that to me over and over when they were convincing me I had to do it.
“It’s not an excuse, and no, I’m not. My mom still refused, saying that if we were murdering pack members for the greater good, then we were no better than the evil we were trying to balance.”
“She said no?”
Cain shrugged. “She tried. They said they would strip her magic if she didn’t do it.
She wouldn’t have minded that if it wasn’t for me. I couldn’t control my magic, and she is the only thing that stands in the way of me and the witches. They hate me for being a hybrid. Hate that Mom was given me by the balance and for that–they won’t let me take the oath to be a part of their magic collective. But like I told her, I don’t want to be a part of it.”
“So if she had refused, and they took her magic…”
“They would have killed me too. We all knew that was what they were alluding to between the lines. So she tried to compromise, make you a hybrid, not use a full sacrifice, but the witches were fed up with her by then. She had already pushed the boundaries by refusing to come back to the mountain because of me, so they put her in her place. They punished her for disobeying.
“It’s why she can only be away from her place for short periods of time, why she ages and the witches don’t, why she gets weaker. Because she refused and they had to force their magic on her, overwhelm her and take control through the collective,”
Cain explained, and it turned my world on its head.
My heart raced with every word he said, at the picture he painted that defied what I had seen. Tabitha was the villain in my head and had been for so long. If Cain and she weren’t at fault, then I had nothing, no face for the regret and hatred during that time.
It was numbing; my head was washing and cleansing, trying to reset the information that had sat inside it for so long.
“Neither of you said anything. She really had no choice?” I asked, and Cain shook his head.
“They took control, which is why I hate them and their fucking collective. They preach balance, but they’re out for themselves. The more powerful the realm is, the more magic they are fed by it. That’s their agenda, and they know I know it, so they use Mom against me, and it is the only reason I haven’t climbed that mountain myself.” Cain narrowed his eyes out the window as if he could see the mountain and visualize the deaths of each and every entity up there.
“Why are you telling me this?” I snarled, hating that he was getting in my head and changing everything. I couldn’t deal with this right now, not when I had the pack in my head and every other damn thing.
“Because you may be pissed at how you became what you did, but it is not her fault, and I am sick of watching her take your shit for it,” Cain snapped, and I bit my tongue at the alpha in me that reared up at his tone.
It wanted to rip his fucking head off for the way he spoke, but the other part of me?
It knew he was right.
“She never told me. Just let me hate her.”
“She’s a huge fan of people coming to these things and feelings on their own. I’m not,” he said.
“I owe her an apology,” I admitted.
Cain nodded. “Yeah.”
“Next time I see her, I’ll make it right,” I promised, putting it off for a bit. I knew what I had to do, but I wasn’t in the right headspace to fix that part of my life at the moment.
I needed to think about what I wanted to say and exactly how to say it before I stormed in there with a sorry that I could only half-ass because I wasn’t sure what I was apologizing for.
“I’m going to check on Beenie,” Cain said finally before leaving me to stew in my regret. It was a fierce one too. I swallowed and looked over the twins. They weren’t asleep, just looking, and I smiled down at them.
How two little things, tiny things, could change everything so drastically was beyond me, but I did know that if they were meant to be the key to this, then I would help them at every turn and be there every time they needed me.
“And to think, you were this withdrawn little alpha not so long ago with only the water as a comfort,” Derik teased as he came in with a smirk. I shook my head, a tug on my own lips pulling them up.
“And to think you were a bossy shit trying to remove his head from his parents’
asses,” I taunted back, and he laughed, coming over to put his finger in Enzi’s hand.
She grabbed it and started sucking his finger with a happy gurgle.
“Still am,” Derik scoffed, his words muttered under his breath. “Thank you, for taking on the pack. I know I should have my shit together and be the one that everyone can rely on, but I don’t have it in me right now. I don’t trust my decisions.”
“You should. You’ve always done right by us,” I reassured, believing every word.
Derik let out a heavy sigh then nodded.
“So have you, Brax. Now go take a minute, I’ll watch the twins,” he said, and I wanted to say I was fine, that I could handle the new pressure without needing a minute, but we both knew I’d be lying.
Instead, I nodded and stood up.
“You know where I’ll be,” I said, and he nodded back.
“Yeah, but be careful, that place is mutual now.”
“I will,” I said, then left the room, the mansion, and the city, heading for the only place that could calm me down, could help me see things straight. The lake.
It wasn’t far from the city. The main pool of the lake went into a cliffside, the water running down it, breaking the silence in the most serene way.
I loved it in winter when the water was so cold but so refreshing. It was peaceful, undisturbed, exactly the way I needed it.
I stripped out of my clothes, then checked the forest, eyeing every tree in the forest line and the cliff edges, before reaching out with my shadows. They spread over the lake, up the waterfall, and into the forest, stretching as far as I could before coming back with nothing–which meant I really was alone.
I walked into the lake, slipping under the water with a slow sink that immersed every thought in there. It blocked everything else out and gave me a clarity that never happened anywhere else.
Like the water knew I needed it to wash away the thoughts and the fear that constantly played in my mind, to refresh it.
I sank right to the bottom, crossing my legs on the bed of the lake that was a light sand. It felt damn good against my skin. The top of the lake looked highlighted, which was weird. There was no moon, but from under the water, I could’ve sworn it’s what I could see.
It wasn’t very bright, but it was enough to make the lake feel magical, despite it being just a water source. But my connection to it? That felt stronger. It felt like that for my whole pack.
Like the water was a calling, one that we had to answer every now and then, or we couldn’t concentrate. It was how Kai got when he hadn’t had a run over the grasslands in a long time, or how Derik needed to be in nature every now and then to calm his thoughts.
It was part of the magic that spoke to our blood, but I was sure I felt it more strongly, thanks to the shadows and winter-born thing.
A fat lot of good it was doing me now, though. I couldn’t even find my mate.
My chest burned, my throat closed as little bubbles escaped my lips. I held my breath until I couldn’t anymore, and shot up to the surface, breaking it and gasping in air, letting my hushed thoughts come running back to me. But they didn’t crowd me like before.
They came in one by one, like a task list that made it easier to cope with.
New Book: Veiled Desires of the Alpha King Novel
Dayson was the alpha of the largest pack in North America. Powerful figures from other packs sought to offer gorgeous girls as potential mates for Dayson. He steadfastly rejected these advances, he was not a pawn to be manipulated. But eventually there came a mysterious girl he could hardly say No. Who was she?