Filed to story: The LORDS Series Free PDF by Shantel Tessier
“No,” I answer.
“Me either.”
CHARLOTTE
I’m exiting the bathroom and stepping into Haidyn’s bedroom at Carnage when I hear the doorknob turn before it opens. He goes to step in when someone calls his name.
“Haidyn?”
He pauses while still in the hallway, but the door remains open while I stand in his bedroom.
“What’s up, Ash?” He sighs, running a hand down his face.
He left me in bed in the middle of the night when Kashton came to get him. He said the Lords needed him. I don’t know where he went or what he did, but judging by the blood on his shirt and jeans, I’d say someone is either dead or wishing they were.
“I wanted to talk to you,” she says softly.
I can’t see her from where she stands because she’s not in the way of the open door, but I can hear her as clear as day. Haidyn stays silent, facing her.
“I just wanted to tell you that I love you too,” she rushes out.
My stomach drops at her words, confused and instantly irritated.
When silence stretches between the two of them, she continues. “So much happened so fast. The wreck…you got shot…” She sniffs. “Those four days… thinking you were dead and then you were alive. After everything unfolded with Benny, you left.” She steps closer to him, coming into view, and I watch her start to wrap her arms around his neck, but he reaches up and grabs her wrists, stopping her.
Her shoulders slump, and he releases her before they drop to her sides. “I’m sorry, Haidyn, for everything. Just know that I do love you.” She stands up on her tiptoes and kisses his cheek before he can pull back, turns around, walking away. The sound of a door closing tells me she returned to her and Saint’s room.
Haidyn turns to enter his door and comes to a stop when he sees me standing by his bed, holding the towel wrapped around my body and hair dripping wet. I got tired of waiting for him to come back, so I took a shower.
He slams the door shut and then silently walks past me, entering the bathroom and shutting that door as well.
I stand staring at the now closed door to his room. I can hear the blood rushing in my ears and feel my heart pounding in my chest. My skin is hot. I decide that I hate her fucking guts. More so than I did when I watched him fuck her ass in that video.
I don’t care what kind of past they have or what kind of future we lack. She knows I’m here with him. She knows that I’m his wife! Why confess her love now? He did so much for her in the past. She had to have known how he felt about her, right? Was she stupid, or just didn’t care then? Four years she was gone and now that she’s back and Haidyn has a wife, she cares? I don’t buy that.
Spinning around, I shove the bathroom door open. The steam has already started to fill the large space from his shower. I yank that door open and cross my arms over my chest. “What was that about?”
He has his back to me. Turning around, he opens his eyes and looks down at me. “Nothing.”
“Nothing?” I give a rough laugh. “She tells you that she loves you…too, might I add, and you call that nothing.” I understand we’re where we are at because of the Lords. But what I just saw makes me want to cut a bitch. My mother and Anne said he loved her, and that’s why he killed their fathers for her. But I never really thought about it until now. Seeing it and hearing it are two very different things. I’m becoming attached to my husband, and I will make sure anyone who tries to take him knows I’ll do whatever it takes to keep him.
“It’s not what you think.” He blows it off.
I snort. “So you’re saying you’ve never told her that you love her?” He remains silent. “Let me guess, you’re also going to tell me that you’ve never fucked her?” When he doesn’t respond, I growl. “That’s what I thought.” I know the truth; I just didn’t want to think of it.
Maybe that video meant more than I thought it did. I know Haidyn has been with other women. Hell, he probably couldn’t even give me a body count if I asked. I’m the dumb one who had to save herself for him.
I go to slam the glass door shut, but he grabs my hand and yanks me into the shower, instantly soaking me and my towel. “Haidyn,” I hiss, wiping the water from my face so I can open my eyes.
He pushes my back into the cold wall, and I shiver as he presses his body into mine. I glare up at him. “So she’s with Saint because she didn’t want you.” I can’t help but keep talking. Maybe I want to piss him off. Perhaps I want him to wrap his hand around my throat and choke me out. Maybe I want him to fuck me so hard that I scream his name so she can hear it from across the hall. Isn’t that what a man is supposed to do-make other women jealous of you?
“No,” he says calmly. “She’s with Saint because I didn’t want her.” His right hand comes up and pushes the wet strands of hair off my cheek. “You’re the one I chose to marry??”
“Because you had to.” I interrupt him. We’re not going to pretend that we got married because we love one another. “Are you still fucking her?” I’m not even sure I want to know the answer to that. A part of me wants him to say yes so I can have a reason to hate him. As if I don’t have enough already. Another part of me pleads with him to lie and say no. Surely, Saint doesn’t allow that. I almost laugh at myself. Of course, Lords share their wives. Wearing a ring and hearing I love you means nothing to them.
SEVENTY
HAIDYN
She slams her palms into my bare chest, trying to push me out of the way. I stay where I am.
“Move,” she snaps, glaring up at me.
“No.”
“Get out of my way, Haidyn,” she shouts.
“I said no.”
“HAIDYN!” Her fists hit my chest.
I grab her wrists to keep her fists from making anymore contact. “I said no, Charlotte. I’m not still fucking Ashtyn.”
She’s breathing heavily, and her hard eyes glare up at me. I like this side of her. Although I’d rather not have had that conversation with Ashtyn, I do like Charlotte’s reaction. It shows me that I’m not going crazy alone. She’s jumped headfirst into this forced marriage with me, and I’m not the only one attached.
I did something that can’t be undone when it comes to my wife. And given the chance, I’d do the same thing again.
This is exactly how she reacted when the Lords sent her the video of me and Ashtyn at the house of Lords. I haven’t told Charlotte that I know about it, and she hasn’t told me. It’ll stay that way. I can play their stupid game and pretend I never saw it. But I’m going to prove to my wife that Ashtyn doesn’t matter to me. Not the way Charlotte thinks anyway.
I didn’t even know Charlotte was listening when Ashtyn stopped me in the hall, or I would have shut down that conversation before it started. I pushed Ashtyn away because I have to establish boundaries with her. Things are different now. I’m different now. And my priority is my wife and how she feels.
Letting go of Charlotte’s wrists, she drops them to her side, and I cup her face. “I haven’t fucked her in years.”
“Bullshit,” she snaps.
I chuckle. “Don’t believe me, doll face?”
“No. I don’t,” she growls. “But let’s go ask her. I bet she won’t lie to me.” Pushing me back, she goes to step around me, and I grab her arm, spinning her around and pulling her against me. I have one hand in her wet hair and the other wrapped around her body.
“I haven’t fucked her since she and Saint got married,” I say truthfully.
“And when was that?” she demands.
“Four years ago,” I answer.
Everything went to shit not long after that. I never wanted Ashtyn like Saint did. Not like I want Charlotte. I didn’t need Ashtyn to tell me she loves me to know how she feels. I never told her that, needing to hear it back. I just wanted her to know that I was there for her.
Charlotte nibbles on her bottom lip, and I cup her face, my thumb pulling it free. Her pretty blue eyes look up at me through her wet lashes. “How many have you fucked since you started fucking me?” Her voice is so low that it’s almost hard to hear over the shower.
I like how nervous she is. How much she wants to know, yet is still afraid of the answer. “No one.” I drop my hand to run my knuckles over her chest. “You’ve been the only one, doll face.” My girl keeps me satisfied. I’ve never been a one-woman kind of guy, but it’s different with Charlotte. I wouldn’t have married her otherwise. “I’ve also never kissed anyone until you,” I tell her. It’s the truth. That day she stood in her kitchen after giving herself over to me, I did what I had wanted to do for so long. Kissing is too personal-intimate. I wanted to make her mine in every way.
She takes in a shaky breath.
“What about you? How many men have you fucked?” I joke, knowing damn well no one else has touched her. They’d be dead if so.
She rolls her eyes and grabs my left hand. “We need to get you a ring.”